WTF i hate marijuana now
August 5, 2025
so i think i figured something out. the period of time where im having horrible obsessions and feeling miserable and depressed constantly also turns out to align with the period of time where im using marijuana like every other day if not every day
so i ran a google search and apparently yeah if youre using marijuana frequently while having a severe mood disorder you also take SSRIs for that can increase the risk of negative side effects from your meds
this is to say i will be trying to use marijuana less, i doubt i will stop using entirely bc let's be honest i ❤️ weed but clearly my relationship to it at this time is not great
i feel ashamed of myself. i kinda wish i could be one of those people who can convince themselves they dont have a problem but im a hypochondriac and im also self aware
even right now as im suffering the effects of it poisoning my fucking brain im craving it 😑 to distract myself i went downtown and poked around some shops which is something i normally like to do. i told myself i wouldnt buy anything butttt i got kmfdm - blitz on cd ^_^ which i was very excited about as that is an album i have been listening to frequently lately
I also found this which i did not purchase. Cute or hideous? you decide
this thing actually makes me wish i was into customs bc i feel this has a lot of potential. you could make a very fun piece out of this
Back to drugs. im trying to taper out w weed use but it is feeling very daunting... i remember some weirdo my friend was friends with talking to me abt how weed isnt addictive or whatever which is 100% horseshit anyway but also like. i want it. i crave it. what do you call that dumb fuck
potheads who insist weed isnt addictive or bad for you at all exhibit record levels of copium its crazy like omg its so convenient that your mind-altering poisonous substance of choice doesnt have any side effects and you can just use it constantly and its fine that must be awesome
Well anyway if i have been more snippy / paranoid / bitchy / negative etc lately well it is probably because of my drug use sorry
also apparently another part of weed / ssri interactions is having to pee all the fucking time ????
i wonder if i went back and told my 11 year old self who was just into drawing and playing video games & having a fun time that im gay & abuse marijuana now how that would go down
speaking of which what do nerdy kids on the internet even... do these days? neopets hasn't been popular for years, deviantart is a shithole now, the youtube fan MV scene isn't what it used to be... what fandoms are kids even in these days? who are the popular artists now? do kids still make sonic ocs and pokesonas i feel like i havent seen any of that kind of stuff lately
EDIT: the thing i found was an animal baby doll by jakks, or something
